Wish I Never Knew...

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
I sometimes wish that certain memories of girls I almost had sex with or dated could disappear forever because all they do is haunt and taunt me. Their faces appear to me at night and their scents, voices, smiles, personalities...all so beautiful. And all I could do is lament at the loss. It'll always be a mystery as to why they didn't want me; is it because I'm ugly, short (5'8 5'9 ish), weird looking, lame, socially fucked, beta??? And no matter what I do in life, the memories of them stay there and hurt. I know they're out there having sex and falling in love with men way better than me. And I am here finding ways to cope....

Life is truly shit for me
 

Whatshappeningtome25

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I sometimes wish that certain memories of girls I almost had sex with or dated could disappear forever because all they do is haunt and taunt me. Their faces appear to me at night and their scents, voices, smiles, personalities...all so beautiful. And all I could do is lament at the loss. It'll always be a mystery as to why they didn't want me; is it because I'm ugly, short (5'8 5'9 ish), weird looking, lame, socially fucked, beta??? And no matter what I do in life, the memories of them stay there and hurt. I know they're out there having sex and falling in love with men way better than me. And I am here finding ways to cope....

Life is truly shit for me
What happened with that co-worker? Did you ask her out?
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
What happened with that co-worker? Did you ask her out?
[/quote]

I have no car and no place of my own. She wouldn't like that shit. I wouldn't even have a way of taking her on a date. Once I learn to drive, I'll ask her if she wants to hang out. I mean we met just 3 weeks ago or so and we get along very well. I talk to her on Instagram. Even asked her to upload a specific picture and she did. So, later on I'll ask her if she wants to chill. She's sweet and chill to be around.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
Whatshappeningtome25 said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I sometimes wish that certain memories of girls I almost had sex with or dated could disappear forever because all they do is haunt and taunt me. Their faces appear to me at night and their scents, voices, smiles, personalities...all so beautiful. And all I could do is lament at the loss. It'll always be a mystery as to why they didn't want me; is it because I'm ugly, short (5'8 5'9 ish), weird looking, lame, socially fucked, beta??? And no matter what I do in life, the memories of them stay there and hurt. I know they're out there having sex and falling in love with men way better than me. And I am here finding ways to cope....

Life is truly shit for me
What happened with that co-worker? Did you ask her out?

have no car and no place of my own. She wouldn't like that shit. I wouldn't even have a way of taking her on a date. Once I learn to drive, I'll ask her if she wants to hang out. I mean we met just 3 weeks ago or so and we get along very well. I talk to her on Instagram. Even asked her to upload a specific picture and she did. So, later on I'll ask her if she wants to chill. She's sweet and chill to be around. I know she's a bit of a flirt with everyone, but as long as I stay on good terms with her, I hope she stays liking me. (I know she thinks I'm a cool guy -- but maybe she thinks I'm ugly. I'm afraid to ask her if she thinks I'm ugly tho)
 

Whatshappeningtome25

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Once I learn to drive, I'll ask her if she wants to hang out. I mean we met just 3 weeks ago or so and we get along very well. I talk to her on Instagram. Even asked her to upload a specific picture and she did. So, later on I'll ask her if she wants to chill.
Yeah I understand your concerns.
I just hope it isn't too late and she loses interest in you and you get friendzoned, or finds someone else meanwhile.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
Whatshappeningtome25 said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Once I learn to drive, I'll ask her if she wants to hang out. I mean we met just 3 weeks ago or so and we get along very well. I talk to her on Instagram. Even asked her to upload a specific picture and she did. So, later on I'll ask her if she wants to chill.
Yeah I understand your concerns.
I just hope it isn't too late and she loses interest in you and you get friendzoned, or finds someone else meanwhile.
Even if she does friendzone me, at least I'll be able to be close to her and hug her and all that hopefully. Probably the closest I'll get to intimacy. Plus, she told me like two weeks ago that she has a boyfriend, but she still seems excited to talk to me and still likes my Instagram pics. I hope I don't lose her in life like I lost the last girl I was obsessed with. They always abandon me. They disappear. Hopefully this chick never gets bored of me. But, I'm still uncertain about her even liking me at all. I feel like she's just trying to be nice to me maybe.....but she did show me her private pictures and asked about my virginity and my likes and dislikes in a relationship.
 

Whatshappeningtome25

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Even if she does friendzone me, at least I'll be able to be close to her and hug her and all that hopefully. Probably the closest I'll get to intimacy.
This is where you are wrong. You will never be happy to see her with someone else, and knowing she friendzoned you. It will tear your brain apart, like it’s doing now. It’s either she becomes your gf, or she doesn’t. If yes, then ok. If not, the best option is to forget about her completely. She will be the barrier for you to get to other women, if she’s always in your mind.
I relate to your intimacy issue though, and the reason why you don’t want to lose her even as a friend. It’s nice to have someone like that to talk about things. But in the long run, it won’t make you happy.
Sorry I really want you to succeed in this.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
Whatshappeningtome25 said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Even if she does friendzone me, at least I'll be able to be close to her and hug her and all that hopefully. Probably the closest I'll get to intimacy.
This is where you are wrong. You will never be happy to see her with someone else, and knowing she friendzoned you. It will tear your brain apart, like it’s doing now. It’s either she becomes your gf, or she doesn’t. If yes, then ok. If not, the best option is to forget about her completely. She will be the barrier for you to get to other women, if she’s always in your mind.
I relate to your intimacy issue though, and the reason why you don’t want to lose her even as a friend. It’s nice to have someone like that to talk about things. But in the long run, it won’t make you happy.
Sorry I really want you to succeed in this.

Thanks man...it's hard out here for an incel. It's like I'm so love/intimacy/sex-starved that I'm willing to be friends with any attractive girl just to be around her and have her know me. It just gets sadder and sadder the lengths I go to feel okay.
 

EyeH8me

Incels.Net Novice
albie said:
On some level she knows she's leading you on.
I agree. Seems like she may have some self image/self esteem issues and she’s using you as a means to stroke that. Be careful.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
Update:

She hugged me today and it felt so amazing. I'm going to ride the tides of this emotional high for awhile until I descend back into my sad, angry, depressed state again.
 

EyeH8me

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Update:

She hugged me today and it felt so amazing. I'm going to ride the tides of this emotional high for awhile until I descend back into my sad, angry, depressed state again.
Was it cringey? Every time I’ve ever hugged a girl, it was so awkward. Like they knew I was off. I would shake like a leaf and get beet red. Like I said. Be careful. Don’t trust her.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
EyeH8me said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Update:

She hugged me today and it felt so amazing. I'm going to ride the tides of this emotional high for awhile until I descend back into my sad, angry, depressed state again.
Was it cringey? Every time I’ve ever hugged a girl, it was so awkward. Like they knew I was off. I would shake like a leaf and get beet red. Like I said. Be careful. Don’t trust her.
I fucking hugged her tight and long and she seemed to like it. First time we hugged, so I wanted to make it memorable. Could be the first and only time. I think I'm just friendzoned. Like, at first our conversations were sexual in nature, then everything transformed and we talk about random other stuff. I hate how I keep thinking about her though.
 

EyeH8me

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
EyeH8me said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Update:

She hugged me today and it felt so amazing. I'm going to ride the tides of this emotional high for awhile until I descend back into my sad, angry, depressed state again.
Was it cringey? Every time I’ve ever hugged a girl, it was so awkward. Like they knew I was off. I would shake like a leaf and get beet red. Like I said. Be careful. Don’t trust her.
I fucking hugged her tight and long and she seemed to like it. First time we hugged, so I wanted to make it memorable. Could be the first and only time. I think I'm just friendzoned. Like, at first our conversations were sexual in nature, then everything transformed and we talk about random other stuff. I hate how I keep thinking about her though.
Put her on ice for a while. The more unavailable you seem, the more she’ll want you. Don’t answer her calls. Maybe make plans with her then break them. Make something up or just say “something came up”. That’s always a good one because then you seem mysterious. Women like busy, mysterious and aloof men. Obviously good being looking and having money play the most significant role. But if she’s been having self
Image/self esteem problems as of late, you can help dimisnish that even more. If you started having sexual type conversations, then obviously she’s interested. If that has stopped, then she saw or smelled something in you that she saw as a red flag. Be it desperation, lack of self confidence or something else. Now you can, since the hug, take some of that back by building yourself back up by seeming too busy to be bothered with her. This never works for me but this is what I have learned reading books and listening to Tom Leykis. It may work for you though.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
EyeH8me said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
EyeH8me said:
Was it cringey? Every time I’ve ever hugged a girl, it was so awkward. Like they knew I was off. I would shake like a leaf and get beet red. Like I said. Be careful. Don’t trust her.
I fucking hugged her tight and long and she seemed to like it. First time we hugged, so I wanted to make it memorable. Could be the first and only time. I think I'm just friendzoned. Like, at first our conversations were sexual in nature, then everything transformed and we talk about random other stuff. I hate how I keep thinking about her though.
Put her on ice for a while. The more unavailable you seem, the more she’ll want you. Don’t answer her calls. Maybe make plans with her then break them. Make something up or just say “something came up”. That’s always a good one because then you seem mysterious. Women like busy, mysterious and aloof men. Obviously good being looking and having money play the most significant role. But if she’s been having self
Image/self esteem problems as of late, you can help dimisnish that even more. If you started having sexual type conversations, then obviously she’s interested. If that has stopped, then she saw or smelled something in you that she saw as a red flag. Be it desperation, lack of self confidence or something else. Now you can, since the hug, take some of that back by building yourself back up by seeming too busy to be bothered with her. This never works for me but this is what I have learned reading books and listening to Tom Leykis. It may work for you though.

Thanks for the advice my man...
 

ralpeg

Incels.Net Novice
Many possible absurdities here.
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
have no car and no place of my own. She wouldn't like that shit.
how old are you?
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I sometimes wish that certain memories of girls I almost had sex with or dated could disappear forever because all they do is haunt and taunt me.
how old are these memories

are you 20 and speaking of memories at 12?

You've also given no reason in your post as to why you think you won't have a car or have your own place. No consdieration of either why you have no future, or a bad future or a good future or any future at all.
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
short (5'8 5'9 ish),
Isn't average height 5'10 and you are one inch under. There are people shorter than you that wear shoes with a big heel

many people wouldn't even say somebody is short if they are 5'7.. let alone 5'8 or 5'9.

Nothing or not much you have written(apart from your height which is not too bad, and that you say you're ugly), has anything to do with DNA which is clearly a concern of yours, considering that you made it your username
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
ralpeg said:
Many possible absurdities here.
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
have no car and no place of my own. She wouldn't like that shit.
how old are you?
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I sometimes wish that certain memories of girls I almost had sex with or dated could disappear forever because all they do is haunt and taunt me.
how old are these memories

are you 20 and speaking of memories at 12?

You've also given no reason in your post as to why you think you won't have a car or have your own place. No consdieration of either why you have no future, or a bad future or a good future or any future at all.
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
short (5'8 5'9 ish),
Isn't average height 5'10 and you are one inch under. There are people shorter than you that wear shoes with a big heel

many people wouldn't even say somebody is short if they are 5'7.. let alone 5'8 or 5'9.

Nothing or not much you have written(apart from your height which is not too bad, and that you say you're ugly), has anything to do with DNA which is clearly a concern of yours, considering that you made it your username
I'm 23 and I'm talking about memories from like the past 3 years or so and stuff that's currently happening. And I just feel like I'm the ugliest man on earth. That super beautiful girl that talks to me and hugged me is really confusing me. My personality is boring, I'm ugly, and I'm just a lame fuck, so I don't know how or why she likes talking to me and enjoys being around me. It's confusing. Maybe I'm so ugly that she feels sorry for me and doesn't want me to kill myself.

Oh and about DNA; my personality, me being "me", and all the other things I hate about me are implemented in my DNA. I cannot change it. It's me. I wish I wasn't me. I wish I could've been somebody (anybody) other than who I am.
 

ralpeg

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I'm 23 and I'm talking about memories from like the past 3 years or so and stuff that's currently happening. And I just feel like I'm the ugliest man on earth. That super beautiful girl that talks to me and hugged me is really confusing me. My personality is boring, I'm ugly, and I'm just a lame fuck, so I don't know how or why she likes talking to me and enjoys being around me. It's confusing. Maybe I'm so ugly that she feels sorry for me and doesn't want me to kill myself.

Oh and about DNA; my personality, me being "me", and all the other things I hate about me are implemented in my DNA. I cannot change it. It's me. I wish I wasn't me. I wish I could've been somebody (anybody) other than who I am.
being ugly isn't the most signifcant factor for women.

You have to be taller than a girl, should be a few inches taller. And that is really easy even at 5'7 and especially at your height of 5'8/5'9. There are loads of girls that are 5'4, 5'2 heck. 5'4 is average height of a girl. So height is a complete non-issue. Sure you're not tall but you're tall enough that height isn't a significant issue.

Personality being boring could be an issue.

So you don't know why a girl has liked being around you. Maybe you don't know why some guys might like being around you. If you are really confused by it, you could ask them. Maybe some people you like being around are people that think they are boring. Sometimes boring people like boring people. Sometimes people that aren't 'boring' are mindless and therefore 'boring' from the pont of view of mindlessness

It looks like you can put sentences together, maybe they think you are intelligent, and that some other people that you think "aren't boring", are mindless and boring. Maybe they want to fix you and think they can.

Is there anything that makes you think you won't be driving or owning a house?!

Are you suggesting that a super beautiful girl has likied you but normal looking girls haven't? or have normal looking girls liked you too? you can ask them why. Or ask friends from your school days that know you and the girls, why.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
ralpeg said:
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
I'm 23 and I'm talking about memories from like the past 3 years or so and stuff that's currently happening. And I just feel like I'm the ugliest man on earth. That super beautiful girl that talks to me and hugged me is really confusing me. My personality is boring, I'm ugly, and I'm just a lame fuck, so I don't know how or why she likes talking to me and enjoys being around me. It's confusing. Maybe I'm so ugly that she feels sorry for me and doesn't want me to kill myself.

Oh and about DNA; my personality, me being "me", and all the other things I hate about me are implemented in my DNA. I cannot change it. It's me. I wish I wasn't me. I wish I could've been somebody (anybody) other than who I am.
being ugly isn't the most signifcant factor for women.

You have to be taller than a girl, should be a few inches taller. And that is really easy even at 5'7 and especially at your height of 5'8/5'9. There are loads of girls that are 5'4, 5'2 heck. 5'4 is average height of a girl. So height is a complete non-issue. Sure you're not tall but you're tall enough that height isn't a significant issue.

Personality being boring could be an issue.

So you don't know why a girl has liked being around you. Maybe you don't know why some guys might like being around you. If you are really confused by it, you could ask them. Maybe some people you like being around are people that think they are boring. Sometimes boring people like boring people. Sometimes people that aren't 'boring' are mindless and therefore 'boring' from the pont of view of mindlessness

It looks like you can put sentences together, maybe they think you are intelligent, and that some other people that you think "aren't boring", are mindless and boring.

Is there anything that makes you think you won't be driving or owning a house?!

I'm just so confused as to why she'd be interested in talking to me at all. It almost feels like I'm being set up or its some kind of big scam. She literally gets flirted with every day at work and our boss tried to sexually harass her constantly. Yet, she goes and talks about sexual things with me and enjoys talking to me. I don't understand. I'm far too ugly to even be seen in the same vicinity as her.

Look, I'm too stupid to learn how to drive. I tried and failed countless times. Operating a vehicle is the second most difficult thing in life (after getting a girlfriend/talking to girls). Plus, when my dad takes me driving he constantly says that one simple mistake could put me in prison forever. All of this makes me even more afraid. I don't think I belong behind the wheel of a car. My brain cannot comprehend the complexity that is a vehicle. It feels like I'm a child still. I still have the same mind state as when I was a kid. I still look the same. I talk the same. I am babied by my helicopter parents. My whole existence is just fucked.
 

ralpeg

Incels.Net Novice
WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Look, I'm too stupid to learn how to drive. I tried and failed countless times. Operating a vehicle is the second most difficult thing in life (after getting a girlfriend/talking to girls). Plus, when my dad takes me driving he constantly says that one simple mistake could put me in prison forever. All of this makes me even more afraid. I don't think I belong behind the wheel of a car. My brain cannot comprehend the complexity that is a vehicle. It feels like I'm a child still. I still have the same mind state as when I was a kid. I still look the same. I talk the same. I am babied by my helicopter parents. My whole existence is just fucked.
How many different driving instructors have you tried?

I tried about 4 different ones. a,b,c,d eventually found 'd' got me to a basic level, then simultaneously took lessons from 'a' for some finer details that got me my pass. Took many years of improvement.

and why are you taking so much driving advice from your dad.. you should take ti from driving instructors

there are even driving instructors that specialise in teaching people with learning difficulties like dyspraxia
 
Top