numb to porn

lordoftheincels

Incels.Net Master
Any of you starting to become asexual and numb to porn? This morning I was in a good mood but my T was high so I fell into another male cravings/rage episode. I started lusting intensely for petite girls that I am not allowed to have. I would do anything to have sex with a cute petite girl.

I started browsing for petite porns but became flaccid. I realized it was just not the same as the real thing. And it was just watching other people have fun and live a good life that I'm not allowed to have. I started to feel hatred and rage in every fibre of my body. The emperor: "The hatred makes you powerful flaccid."

The first porn i used to browse was lesbian porn. Realizing it would never be me. Got so sick and tired of the deep envy I'd feel so I started watching straight porns. Realizing it would never be me, got so sick and tired of the deep sense of despair I'd feel the porn made me numb. Also got sick of looking at gross guys. So I started watching tranny porn where a tranny fucks a petite girl. Still realizing it would never be me, so I got numb to all porns, in all porns I realized it was boring and unwatchable.

I want to change my avatar to something more aggressive. But I can't find any on google that fit. I'm sick of this modern society where noone gets mad. The other day I screamed at the top of my lungs. Now I have a sore throat. My chad dad said I need to "sort through my thoughts". He told me he had bad relationships and he knows how it feels. As if. He was a chad that got pumped and dumped by women. At least he got to get laid.

I'm sick of being a goodie two shoes and pretending women have been fair to me. In my personal experience, every single modern woman I tried to date has been PURE EVIL. I even dated a chick who was proud of being a sociopath. Every chick acts the same to me. I send them a harmless message and they ignore. Or they come to me for emotional support, and I give them emotional support, then they just ghost me and ignore. They just use me like I'm some kind of object. Sex with women is doing them a favor...clearly they are uncomfortable with a real relationship so using them for sex is what they are begging for. They have no idea how to treat other human beings, or how to communicate in a sane manner, at least in my own personal experience.


One time in real life I saw a petite chick I wanted to have sex with so bad. But the place was crawling with feminisms. And I was afraid of getting rejected so I didn't make a move. She seemed so happy with her friend, constantly playing games and laughing and shit. And I was just tall and unhappy and miserable. How could she date someone like me, someone so broken and miserable. So big and tall and she is so petite and 18. It would be like a hardened veteran with PTSD trying to date some sheltered 18 y.o. teen who has an easy life of ignorance. And nowadays women don't want to date you unless you have a relatable personality. How could she go for someone like me. If I asked for her number she'd probably ghost me like all the others. Damned if you do damned if you don't. I guess I'll never know. But I just assume she would have treated me like shit just like all the other girls do. I'm so sick of the feminist narrative of women being kind people. At least in America that isn't the case.
 

WelcomeToMyDNA

I am who I am and I can be no other
Re: numb to pοrn

Yeah, getting her number would have been a mistake. Last year I met a girl at a concert and didn't get her number, but we talked. I regretted not getting her number so much. Then a few months later I randomly saw her again at the mall. Still didn't get her name or number but we talked again and marveled at the coincidence. Finally, I randomly saw her a third time -- at a different concert. I got asked for her number finally. She gave it to me. Everything was going good for a bit, until she told me her ex wanted her back so she got back with him and abandoned me as if I never existed. I still have her number and when I text her, she responds like twice and then leaves me on read again. I was in love with her and I even told her this, but she was indifferent to my existence because I'm too ugly.

Fucked up world for an ugly human being. It's like ugly people wear ugly lenses and must see the world as an ugly place while beautiful, successful people wear difference lenses and see this world as something entirely different. Almost like the Matrix.
 

lordoftheincels

Incels.Net Master
Re: numb to pοrn

WelcomeToMyDNA said:
Yeah, getting her number would have been a mistake. Last year I met a girl at a concert and didn't get her number, but we talked. I regretted not getting her number so much. Then a few months later I randomly saw her again at the mall. Still didn't get her name or number but we talked again and marveled at the coincidence. Finally, I randomly saw her a third time -- at a different concert. I got asked for her number finally. She gave it to me. Everything was going good for a bit, until she told me her ex wanted her back so she got back with him and abandoned me as if I never existed. I still have her number and when I text her, she responds like twice and then leaves me on read again. I was in love with her and I even told her this, but she was indifferent to my existence because I'm too ugly.

Fucked up world for an ugly human being. It's like ugly people wear ugly lenses and must see the world as an ugly place while beautiful, successful people wear difference lenses and see this world as something entirely different. Almost like the Matrix.
That's exactly how women are. And I'm sick of the modern narrative telling me about how women are such nice, compassionate people. I'll believe it when I see it. But for me its always the same repetitive experience, women hot and cold. Using me like a toy or play thing for their mind games. Not even used as a sex object out of the deal. I get nothing and they get to toy with my mind with their sick mind games. They'll suddenly think about me and act interested. Then get bored with my like I'm some kind of piece of yarn to them. They don't know how to treat human beings. Yet have the nerve to say incels don't know what it means to be human.

I don't think I'm ugly unless I don't shave, then I look like an ugly hombre. I just think the standards of 2019 are so damn high. I think I need a fancy car and money. As well act like a hipster instead of a depressed miserable person. I make a point not to keep track of all the new modern songs and c-rap artists. I view hipsters as weak and generic cucks that make me angry. So I'm out of touch with the normies and they sense I'm an outsider and not low iq like them.
 

reg509

Incels.Net Novice
Re: numb to pοrn

lordoftheincels said:
I think I need a fancy car and money. As well act like a hipster instead of a depressed miserable person. I make a point not to keep track of all the new modern songs and c-rap artists. I view hipsters as weak and generic cucks that make me angry. So I'm out of touch with the normies and they sense I'm an outsider and not low iq like them.
Fancy cars do nothing for incels. I've got an oldschool Cadillac that sticks out on the road today like a chad at comic con. The only time it ever got any attention from a female is when I gave my older chad friend a ride and she thought it was his car and I was his soyboy chauffeur. Also I agree with your assessment of hipsters and the OP.

I started watching porn when I was 11. For me, the biggest thrill of porn came from the taboo nature of me watching it. That was still a point in life where I had a chance. Watching porn didn't yet make me feel inadequate, it instead filled my mind with fantasies about that being me in the future. Now that I'm grown up and blackpilled I see the truth and realize that it'll never be me fucking those women with or without a camera. So there's just no spark there anymore, and I really hate that it's come to this point because throughout my teenage years porn used to be the only good thing I had to escape my miserable life, but now there's nothing.
 

Lordgoro

MAD as a Hatter!
Re: numb to pοrn

Damn I WISH I could get numb to it, and maybe even LOSE my sexuality!! At almost 50 I shouldnt HAVE to pleasure myself an average 6 times a day! Its fcking ridiculous... I thought it was supposed to slow down after 40s? Not in my case unfortunately
 

freakingloser427

Incels.Net Junior
Re: numb to pοrn

Lordgoro said:
Damn I WISH I could get numb to it, and maybe even LOSE my sexuality!! At almost 50 I shouldnt HAVE to pleasure myself an average 6 times a day! Its fcking ridiculous... I thought it was supposed to slow down after 40s? Not in my case unfortunately
6x a day? Mad respect for you. I wouldn't be able to accomplish that if I tried...
 

Lordgoro

MAD as a Hatter!
Re: numb to pοrn

freakingloser427 said:
Lordgoro said:
Damn I WISH I could get numb to it, and maybe even LOSE my sexuality!! At almost 50 I shouldnt HAVE to pleasure myself an average 6 times a day! Its fcking ridiculous... I thought it was supposed to slow down after 40s? Not in my case unfortunately
6x a day? Mad respect for you. I wouldn't be able to accomplish that if I tried...
TRUST me, Its NOT a gift, its a CURSE!! Even though Im pretty much a lifelong incel, there are many aspects of me that are so far out of the ordinary its crazy! Personally I consider myself Far more unique and amazing than ANY chad whos in the world today, however, even with all my gifts and characteristics, Im 100 percent INCEL, and therefore less then worthless in society's eyes! A damned SHAME!!
 

lordoftheincels

Incels.Net Master
Re: numb to pοrn

Lordgoro said:
freakingloser427 said:
Lordgoro said:
Damn I WISH I could get numb to it, and maybe even LOSE my sexuality!! At almost 50 I shouldnt HAVE to pleasure myself an average 6 times a day! Its fcking ridiculous... I thought it was supposed to slow down after 40s? Not in my case unfortunately
6x a day? Mad respect for you. I wouldn't be able to accomplish that if I tried...
TRUST me, Its NOT a gift, its a CURSE!! Even though Im pretty much a lifelong incel, there are many aspects of me that are so far out of the ordinary its crazy! Personally I consider myself Far more unique and amazing than ANY chad whos in the world today, however, even with all my gifts and characteristics, Im 100 percent INCEL, and therefore less then worthless in society's eyes! A damned SHAME!!
Friendly reminder that Neitzche, Tesla, Newton, and many others were incel. Women seem to have no appreciation for greater men. Idiocracy in 50-500 years possibly.
 

Lordgoro

MAD as a Hatter!
Re: numb to pοrn

Agreed 100 percent.. I think some of the most uniquely gifted males in the world were INCEL.. So im in good company...
 
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