My steps to realizing that I was an incel. What are yours?

bcroger2

Well-Known Member
Lounge member
These are generally in order
1. I pushed the issue away and thought that it would get better in the future-For example, after a semester of college , I thought , "don't worry, i'll get a G.F next semester. Now is just not the time. I was so popular with girls in H.S and middle school."

2. Mental gymnastics/using past experiences I had with females I had as a child to validate my appearance. I thought I was very handsome because girls(some who were very attractive) in 7th-12th grade liked me. I told myself that my blonde counselor in the 12th grade liked me because she would ask to study/hangout with me. In reality, I did have lots of girlfriends in middle and H.S, so I thought that girls really liked me in college/in the real world.

Every time a girl gave me one word responses or rejected me I thought, "I was just not persuasive enough" or "she already had a boyfriend. More attractive girls in the 12th grade liked me, so she must as well" or "she never knew me well enough." Mental gymnastics made it difficult for me to acknowledge the truth.

3. Slight flirtations or normal interactions turned into romantic fantasies- if a girl talked to me a little , I thought she liked me. I would walk around the house and fantasize being with her even though she may of just said a few words to me. Caught a girl staring at me (or at least in my direction) and imagined being with her.
 

bcroger2

Well-Known Member
Lounge member
Now with that being said, i'm still trying. I made a Tinder account and did attract a black chick and some whales. I plan on uploading better pictures in the future. Wish me luck.
 

Pnuthed

Member
When I realized I can't even be just friendly and polite (nod and say hello while passing on the street) without an attitude, eyeroll and shudder. Normal people aren't treated this way.
 

tremor

Well-Known Member
Staff Member
Lounge member
bcroger2 said:
Now with that being said, i'm still trying. I made a Tinder account and did attract a black chick and some whales. I plan on uploading better pictures in the future. Wish me luck.
You matchmog maybe like half of the incelosphere combined ded srs.
 

bcroger2

Well-Known Member
Lounge member
tremor said:
bcroger2 said:
Now with that being said, i'm still trying. I made a Tinder account and did attract a black chick and some whales. I plan on uploading better pictures in the future. Wish me luck.
You matchmog maybe like half of the incelosphere combined ded srs.
None of those tinder dates even bothered to reply to my messages.
 

tremor

Well-Known Member
Staff Member
Lounge member
bcroger2 said:
None of those tinder dates even bothered to reply to my messages.
That's sad. It makes the very fact they intentionally, seriously matched with you questionable.

Online dating is only for Chad anyway.
 

lordoftheincels

Well-Known Member
Staff Member
Lounge member
bcroger2 said:
These are generally in order
1. I pushed the issue away and thought that it would get better in the future-For example, after a semester of college , I thought , "don't worry, i'll get a G.F next semester. Now is just not the time. I was so popular with girls in H.S and middle school."

2. Mental gymnastics/using past experiences I had with females I had as a child to validate my appearance. I thought I was very handsome because girls(some who were very attractive) in 7th-12th grade liked me. I told myself that my blonde counselor in the 12th grade liked me because she would ask to study/hangout with me. In reality, I did have lots of girlfriends in middle and H.S, so I thought that girls really liked me in college/in the real world.

Every time a girl gave me one word responses or rejected me I thought, "I was just not persuasive enough" or "she already had a boyfriend. More attractive girls in the 12th grade liked me, so she must as well" or "she never knew me well enough." Mental gymnastics made it difficult for me to acknowledge the truth.

3. Slight flirtations or normal interactions turned into romantic fantasies- if a girl talked to me a little , I thought she liked me. I would walk around the house and fantasize being with her even though she may of just said a few words to me. Caught a girl staring at me (or at least in my direction) and imagined being with her.
Sounds similar to me.

1. Is almost the same. As a teen I had opportunities for girls but was too mentalcel to seal the deal. Some women were nice to me when I was a teen, now as an adult they are mostly cruel or apathetic.
2. Same, except had no girlfriends because I was mentalcel.
3. Yep, same. But my rational mind new I was incel and deep down knew it would never happen, making me fill with anger at the fantasies.

tremor said:
bcroger2 said:
Now with that being said, i'm still trying. I made a Tinder account and did attract a black chick and some whales. I plan on uploading better pictures in the future. Wish me luck.
You matchmog maybe like half of the incelosphere combined ded srs.
Im not sure if bcroger2 was that chadlite we saw the other day or if it was someone else.

Each day women seem more and more picky and easily repulsed by males so it's getting harder and harder. It's sort of like how Ozzy Ozbourne goes on American Idol and gets utterly blasphemed.
 

bcroger2

Well-Known Member
Lounge member
tremor said:
bcroger2 said:
None of those tinder dates even bothered to reply to my messages.
That's sad. It makes the very fact they intentionally, seriously matched with you questionable.

Online dating is only for Chad anyway.
True. I thought online dating was my way out. I was wrong

I feel bad for other FAs who think that online dating is their way out of being a virgin. Only thing to do is study your ass off and become a doctor , lawyer or dentist and make $150,000+ a year.
 

RedKoi

New Member
#3 is so true though.
I wouldn't even realize I'd be doing it.
To them, it's just idle conversation or a simple glance in my direction. But I'd always end up taken aback with thoughts and fantasies. Always blindly assuring myself the feeling was mutual for some odd reason.
 

albie

Well-Known Member
BANNED
Always knew I was Incel. Always felt like a nothing. Born that way or made that way by my asshole father. KISS.MY.BEARD!!!!!!!!!!
 

inunotaisho

Member
Was kind of satisfied with myself, then time passed. I realized I was inferior in every possible way, teeth crooked to hell, Scoliosis which inhibits movement in my left arm and leg. Short stature 5'5. Early onset of receding hairline. Extremely hairy, hairy back, chest, etc. Overall I can say my parents didnt do much of a good job. I previously attempted to get a girlfriend up until last year of high school.
Spent a year gyming, got the last chub off my body and looked pretty lean. So I went to university with the full intention of getting a girlfriend.

Now, I live in Sweden. I saw some other 5'5 in the small northern town I lived in. Going south however is where the real Swedes are (and arabs and africans). The average height there is like 6'1-6'2 for the men and the girls are all atleast 5'7.
I have no problem with talking to people. One of the best traits people say about me is how I am frank about everything and easy to talk to. I immediately experienced however that girls pretty much sidelined or friendzoned me instantly.
Most hurting was when they asked if I was gay (i am part sami which were my shitty height comes from) and I have quite an effeminate face, asian round. I've heard it before and laughed it off, seeing at just a joke. But when people who had known me for just like 4-6 months started saying it I pretty much found out I wasnt a dating option.

I began analyzing myself and came to the conclusion that overall my genes were ѕhit and I had previously imagined myself having kids in the future, now I see ugly people together with kids and I loathe how they're making those kids lives miserable, we're allowing stupid and ugly people to breed when at this point we actually should start thinking about refining the world population. Allow 6's and aboves to breed. The high IQ thing for us to do is choose to walk into extinction.
 

EyeH8me

Active Member
Personally, it’s been the failure of everything I tried to do to seem normal. Approaching women and attempting to start a dialogue ends up awkward and cringey. If I ever did get passed that, my lack of experience at intimacy was shown immediately due to my nervousness about knowing I’m abnormal socially when intimacy would begin (kissing or hugging). I didn’t have the right moves. I would kiss like a 3rd grader, or I would shake while hugging or kissing which came off as having no confidence which is a major turn off. Just very awkward. I would think something went well with a female but then try to call her and she would put me on speaker with her friends listening in the background giggling because I know she told them about how awkward and weird I was. Then I’d never hear from her again. This also applied to jobs. And other things I tried to do to seem normal like sports. I realized I am not normal and will never be and could and since have never been able to point my finger as to what it is. It must be something genetic. Or maybe a previous life where I was an asshole chad and now I’m doomed with this lack of confidence and awkward social behavior that I unable to shake. Whatever it is, it’s been that way my whole life and I now 40 years old. I’ve been able to build a life that is based upon a lie of what people think I should be. But that came with years of inner turmoil and uncomfortable practice at being someone I’m not. Every day I wake up, I don’t feel like me yet a billboard of what society wants me to be. It’s very hard. But I persevere hoping that my next life will be better. Knowing that I pushed through this one the only way I knew how. By lying.
 

StoicNihilist

Well-Known Member
Lounge member
More or less I always knew I was a bit of an outcast, but I guess theres a few things that really validated it:

I never was really invited to any party or social event. Or when I was, got constantly mocked and teased, like they only invited me there to screw with me. I also knew how to get booze and cigarettes in high school, so they invited me just for that as well, to use me as a resource.

-one time we were drinking and some girl suggested we play spin the bottle. Some of the other girls looked nervous, and made up a special rule that if the bottle spun on me, they would only have to high five me. The Chad's got to kiss and make out of course. I was 16 at the time and realized there was no hope for me after that.
 
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