I'm sorry you deal with that. Have you ever considered that you might be, like, imagining looks of disgust? When I was at my darkest place and very, VERY insecure (I had body dysmorphia), Ithought that everyone was looking ar me disgustedly, talking about me, laughing at me.Being IGNORED my whole life by girls, or when they are Flirting with another guy near me on the street, when they actually SEE me they get a BLANK look instantly covering their face, like I DONT EXIST!! Even worse, all the looks of DISGUST I get from women in grocery stores, etc.. and I dont even TALK to them, just when they see me walking! Its RIDICULOUS!! If I could become a TOTAL Hermit and never have to leave my house, I WOULD..
Based on the way some incels talk about themselves and their bodies, I wonder if they have body dysmorphia. It's a fairly common anxiety disorder where you pinpoint certain features of your face/body and blow WAY out of proportion how ugly those features are